REVIEW 147: KYAA SUPER KOOL HAIN HUM

Release date:	July 27, 2012
Director:	Sachin Yardi
Cast: Language:	Riteish Deshmukh, Tusshar Kapoor, Sarah Jane Dias, Neha Sharma, Anupam Kher, Chunkey Pandey Hindi

I was scared after watching Kyaa Super Kool Hain Hum. No seriously, I’m not trying to take an indirect swipe at the quality of its humour. I genuinely mean I was slightly scared after watching a late show of this film at a supposedly upmarket multiplex in the city, in a hall filled mostly with all-male groups of buddies sprinkled with just a handful of couples. Those guys had obviously pre-judged the film quite accurately from its trailer, and went off into peals of laughter at every single ‘joke’ about semen, gay men, lesbian women, menstruation, humping dogs, breasts, rape, masturbation, anal sex, anuses, penises, vaginas, fellatio and Hindi words with opening syllables that sound similar to the English word “macho”, apart from children with progeria, dark-skinned people, short people, Africans, stammering, etc etc.

With all its crudeness, I could still have enjoyed Kyaa Super Kool Hain Hum if it had been funny. But here’s the only funny part of this story … it’s not. The film reminded me of my junior school days when kids would giggle at the very mention of “sex”, and when the use of words such as “coming” and “period” was enough to elevate any anecdote to the status of a joke. Worse, after the first quarter of an hour of this film, I could see most of those ‘jokes’ coming from a mile away. Oh wait, I just wrote the word “coming” … So witty, na?

Clearly the makers of Kyaa Super Kool Hain Hum revel in negative reviews as you can see from their film’s poster. So let me make it clear, my dear reader, I’ve enjoyed my share of bawdy and loud humour on occasion. In spite of their noise levels, I actually had fun through Bol Bachchan and Rowdy Rathore. Though Desi Boyz often defied logic, I had a good time watching it. I’m not at all embarrassed to admit that I died of laughter seeing the Hollywood film Hangover and even the prequel to the film we’re discussing right now. Yes, 2005’s Kyaa Kool Hai Hum was homophobic, shrill and low brow, but it was funny because it knew how to be cheap in a clever way. Kyaa Super Kool Hain Hum, however, is not even trying. Apparently mentioning the name “Ektaa” in a film produced by Ektaa Kapoor constitutes a gag. It seems to be becoming mandatory to throw Marathi dialogues into every film starring Riteish Deshmukh; apparently that too is hilarious. Apparently relevance to context is irrelevant, which can be the only explanation for why each time Tusshar Kapoor’s character spots director Rohit Shetty (playing himself) in this film, he starts mimicking the speech defect of the character he played in Shetty’s Golmaal series. The writing is so flat that I suspect a pre-pubescent child could do better.

I got so bored after the first 15 minutes of Kyaa Super Kool Hain Hum, that I actually counted the number of times I laughed through its 137 minutes: the final tally is eight times. That’s mostly because Riteish – one of Bollywood’s finest comedians – is capable of wrenching some comedy even out of the most godforsaken script. I wish he would give his own talent the respect it deserves, by staying away from films like this one. Riteish and Tusshar share a comfortable chemistry with each other. The girls playing their girlfriends are the other bright spot in this otherwise dreary film. Sarah Jane Dias and Neha Sharma are both easy on the eye and easy in front of the camera. The songs aren’t particularly tuneful (the exception being the UP Bihar lootne remix), but the cast throw themselves into each number with energy and verve, which marginally compensates for the fact that those numbers pop up out of the blue, with little connection to what comes before or after.

What’s the story, did I hear you ask? Oh sorry, I forgot, it doesn’t have one! Now dreading the possibility of Kyaa Uber Kool Hain Hum!

Rating (out of five): *

CBFC Rating (India):	A
Running time:	137 minutes

Photograph courtesy: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kyaa_Super_Kool_Hain_Hum